5 Reasons the Super Bowl Shuffle Still Sucks

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Maybe it's because I was three when it first happened, or maybe it's just because I like disagreeing with G. in a public forum, but with this post I hereby decree that we let the Super Bowl Shuffle go. Now, before you go all Mike Ditka and start getting up in my (blog post's) face, just hear out my arguments.

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5 Reasons "The Super Bowl Shuffle" Is Still Awesome



  • A visibly uncomfortable back-up QB Steve Fuller dancing and screeching like he's got a goal post up his ass. (3:11)
  • "I'm not here to feather's ruffle…" (3:25) Is that the best they could think of to rhyme with shuffle? Apparently so. Thanks again, Steve!
  • You've gotta be kidding us, Steve. During this 4-second shot of the stage (3:39-3:43) you're dancing against the grain! What the screw is wrong with you?
  • Richard Dent starts off strong, singing "if the quarterback's slow, he's gonna get bent" but kinda quits around the word "pass." (4:08) Show some heart, damnit, this is for charity.
  • "It's Gary here and I'm Mr. Clean…" (4:24) Gary Fencik's got the voice of a choir boy with his sack stuck in a car door. Plus, when he sings "ring your bell" it's a bit too fabulous for our taste. Now we know why they call him "hitman." (Wink!)
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    [12/2/2008]