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F--ck da Eagles Heather

She gave the FCC the finger, so we gave her a photo shoot. Everyone wins.

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During the Saints/Eagles Divisional Playoff game, Heather Rothstein appeared on national television sporting an FCC-unapproved profanity-laden shirt. (If you haven´t already guessed, it said "Fuck Da Eagles.") The controversy caused by her four-letter foray into the spotlight gave us an idea: Let´s take pictures of her. So we did, and then we sat down and talked to Heather about her beloved New Orleans Saints, drinking Pop Rocks and Chicago´s lack of football etiquette.

What´s your day job when you´re not on national television wearing profane T-shirts?
Heather: I´m a singer at the Famous Door in New Orleans.

What´d you think of your first Maxim shoot?
I totally enjoyed it. It took me a little while to loosen up a little bit. I finally figured out that the least comfortable positions are the ones that look the best in photos. Only took me all day to figure it out.

What was the best part about it?
The best part was the people I got to meet. I enjoyed and liked everybody involved. I couldn´t have asked for a more comfortable situation.

Now, the tough questions: How much did it hurt when your Saints lost?
Pretty bad. The Saints were like the Cinderella story of the year. Everybody in New Orleans wanted the Saints to win. We almost got a little bit too dependent on it because it would´ve been such a great finale to the year. Especially coming back from Katrina.

Are you a season ticket holder?
Yeah. I sit in the same seats, every game, 30-yard line. So the one day I´m wasted and half-undressed, I make it on national television with "Fuck" on my shirt. [laughs] Just insane. Usually I don´t get drunk at the games because I need to pay attention to what´s going on.

But this time you had a few too many?
Yeah, just to give you a little insight into how my day was going, before the game I was drinking Red Bull and vodka and pouring Pop Rocks into my mouth, letting it foam out.

We´ve all been there. Have you gotten much feedback on your shirt?
Oh, are you kidding? It´s been a huge deal. Some of the comments on YouTube were pure hatred. People were just like "I wish Katrina had killed all of y´all." And I´m like, "You´re probably 13 years old and can´t even spell ´hurricane´ so fuck off." I quit reading anything about it.

Did you have to cover the shirt up to get into the stadium?
No, I just walked right in. I mean, it´s New Orleans. I was with seven or eight people that had the same shirt on. You can buy shirts downtown that say, "I got shit-faced on Bourbon Street." It´s just part of New Orleans. Nobody thinks anything of stuff like that. Nobody thought anything of it when they saw it in the Quarter. Of course, they freaked out when I got on TV. But if I ever thought in a million years I would´ve been on TV for that game I would´ve gone with "Hi Mom," ya know? Just like everyone else.

Got a Super Bowl prediction?
I´m going to have to go with the Colts. I had a really crappy experience in Chicago. People threw eggs, donuts, beer and snowballs at us. And they were cowards about it. They would throw something at us, and then we´d turn around and nobody would be there. I mean, if you have the balls to throw an egg at me you better have the balls for me to kick your ass.

It was the most terrible sports experience I´ve ever been through. And the dick-to-chick ratio sucked. For every 500 guys there was one girl. It was terrible. And in New Orleans, it´s guy-girl, guy-girl, guy-girl. It´s southern hospitality down there. We´ll get you shit-faced on Bourbon Street before we whoop your football team´s ass, and then we all drink together again after. So it was like a real culture shock for me. I was like "Wow, you guys suck!" They were mean.

After they threw snowballs at Santa, cheered Michael Irvin´s neck injury and threw D-cell batteries at players, we don´t think you should go to Philadelphia, either.

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[1/9/2009]