Hey, we love NCAA hoops as much as the next guy, but you've got to admit: Some of it is pretty goddamn stupid.

The NCAA Tournament play-in game
An underdog is only lovable when it's playing a good team. When it's two underdogs playing for the right to lose to North Carolina by five touchdowns, it's called a sucky game.

Dick Vitale
With all the energy this 68-year-old maniac needlessly expends on dunkaroos, "diaper dandies," and general awesomeness, Dickie V should be able to light Cameron Indoor Stadium on aneurysm power.